IOU

It's been brought to my attention that I haven't blogged in a while, and I'm depriving you all of essential reading material. Sorry bout that.

Unfortunately you're going to have to continue to wait. My life is exhausting these days. I'm on spring break, and just got back from a very fun ski and visit friends trip. I was a little concerned because this was my first time seeing these friends sober, and I wasn't sure how my new self was going to do with them. Turns out I had little to worry about and I had a great time. Only problem is that now I'm way behind on sleep and am struggling to get caught up. This week is midterms at school so it's going to be a stressful one.

Emotionally I'm struggling a bit right now. I seem to be having crazy mood swings. I'm either way way up and literally skipping/running around smiling and being stupidly cheerful, or so down that I feel like I can't do anything. The middle ground seems to be lost for now and it's frustrating. I do enjoy the happy stuff but it's over the top and not sustainable.

Today the flashbacks came back with a vengeance. That scares me a little because this happens to be the day that I'm going off the flashback meds for good. I've been weening off them for a while now (they seem to be unnecessary and have crappy side effects) and this is the first time i've seen any issue. Hopefully it's just a fluke/coincidence.

That's all for now. Will write more another time. Nitey nite!


Oh wait...one more thing. Have you noticed the sobriety counter on the side of the site? Have you noticed the number? I reached, and passed, the 90 day mark. How cool is that?! I remember so well when I didn't think I could make it sober a day...or a week...everyone kept talking about the 3 month mark being this big deal of really getting somewhere in sobriety and I thought I could never make it that long. Here I am and goin' strong! :-D Though I think it might be a little related to some of my crazy thinking...because since everyone makes a big deal out of it I sorta feel like I'm supposed to be doing better than I am, or that i'm supposed to just "get it" now. Stupid, I know, but I can't help myself. Anyway, yay for 90 days! :)