Sunday, August 5, 2012

Olympic announcers are stupid

Figured I could use some humor, so don't go taking offense if your uncle's friend's cousin's neighbor's former roommate is an olympic announcer.  Actually, that'd be pretty badass if said relative/friend-like person is an olympic announcer.

Anyway, I've been watching the olympics a lot lately.  I've discovered that Olympic announcers are stupid.  It's not their fault.  They have to talk throughout entire events.  If you asked me to talk non-stop for an hour or more, I wouldn't come across as especially bright either.  I've been keeping a collection of especially fun lines I've heard while watching.

"She's really getting a workout today!"  As opposed to those sports that are easy and require no physical effort?

"That was a race from start to finish!"  Going the other way would be awfully confusing.

"This really is a must-win match!"  Said before almost every match of a single-elimination tournament.  Ya think?

"She tired, but she still had the energy to jump 3 times after winning."  Ummmm descriptive?

"He's really trained hard for this."  Unlike most olympians who just sailed right in with no effort...maybe just from eating Subway a lot...

"4th place is the worst place to finish at the olympics!"  Ok I get their point here, but I'd choose 4th over last.  Or even over 5th.

"They're not messing around tonight!"  Nice of them to finally take this whole international competition thing seriously...

"That was a nice hug.  A good, quality, meaningful hug."  You know you're really short on things to talk about when you start critiquing hugs between teammates!

"She's making sure to take care of her tootsies tonight."  (In beach volleyball, after one player got cold, numb feet in a previous game).  Tootsies??  Really??


I'm sure there's more but that's all I can think of for the moment.  I'll throw in one more bit of comedy that shows that just how easily entertained I am.  I'm watching women's beach volleyball.  The top part of the uniform for beach volleyball pairs essentially looks like a sports bra with 3 letters of the country written on it.  I'm currently watching Brazil play, so they are wearing bright yellow bras that say BRA on them in large capital letters, both front and back.  And it's cracking me up.  I appreciate them being labeled in case I get confused: http://www.fivbheroes.com/2012/08/olympic-fivb-heroines-in-last-16-in-beach-volleyball/

Oh, and none of these holds a candle to a couple of olympics ago when the catch phrase for the diving announcers on a good dive was that the diver "really put it in the water!"  I would really hate to see them put it anywhere else!  Apparently I wasn't the only one because I haven't heard that said yet this year.

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